Tuesday, March 15, 2011

The Show

Entertainment comes in many forms: traveling, sports, gambling, boating, movies, theater, and the list can go on and on. The bigger the bank roll the more vast the playground. An area of entertainment that always comes under scrutiny is the adult entertainment industry; in particular exotic dancers. From gentlemen clubs to male reviews people from all walks of life flock to get their “shake-a-booty” fix. I know I’m going to catch some flack about this from my friends, but I’m willing to put it out there for the sake of getting the discussion going. So let’s do it…

It’s been heavily debated whether or not those in relationships (especially men) should spend time in strip clubs. The moral court says that it presents temptation men/women should not be exposed to. The feminist court says that men who venture to these places are misogynistic and that the women are victims. The court of free will says who cares as long as no one is cheating. Ask anyone out there male or female and I’m sure you’ll get an opinion. What’s surprising to most is that I err on the side of free will. In my opinion a stripper is no more tempting than a cute co-worker or sexy intern if the intent is there. What people fail to realize is regardless of how many rules or stipulations you have in place; if someone wants to be dishonest and cheat they will find a way. Ironically enough, that way will more than likely be with someone you know as opposed to Candy from Delilah’s. In my lifetime I’ve had a few encounters with the strip club scene.

From those encounters I observed the following:

1. Female patrons are much more aggressive than their male counterparts

2. Female patrons appear to be married and over the age of 30

3. Female patrons appear to spend a lot of money in strip clubs

4. Female patrons don't seem to be phased by interacting with half naked men.

That being said it boils down to the common societal stereotype that good girls don’t take off their clothes for money. Bad boys, on the other hand, can do what they please. I didn’t see any women at the club telling “Dark Stranger” he should be ashamed of himself. If anything they prompted him to take it off!

Final Word: A strip club, like any of the other activities previously named, is no more than a form of entertainment.  The problem ensues when boundaries are crossed and your homelife is no longer a priority.  Having breakfast, lunch and dinner at the Player's Club (by the way eating at a strip club is gross) is definitely a sign that something is wrong in your relationship.  The key is that everything should be done in moderation.

Thanks for reading!
Ms. Ty

Friday, March 4, 2011


We’ve all encountered “super women” in our lives. Women like our mothers, grandmothers, and aunts are held in regard as the consummate SUPERWOMAN. There have been songs written over time about women who appear to be able to do everything for everyone. What does that do to our psyche? What does it say about who we are as women?

Some of you may remember the 1988 hit, “Superwoman” by R&B artist Karyn White. In it she expresses her frustrations with trying to do everything in her relationship from, cooking breakfast to maneuvering through rush hour, yet it all seems to go unnoticed. In the chorus she says, “I’m not your superwoman…boy I am only human, this girl needs more than occasional hugs as token of love from you to me.”

In 2007, Alicia Keys released her own song titled the same, in which she embraces being all and every woman. In it Keys sings, “Cause I am superwoman, yes I am, still when I’m a mess I still put on a vest with an S on my chest.”

For all of the women out there who are or who try to be everything these two songs speak volumes. Women are innately wired to take care of other people. Yes, I know this is a generalization, but it is one I am willing to make. On one hand we take care of our children, spouses, or even our parents. Add to that our work responsibilities, school (if applicable), and personal hobbies/activities and you have the formula for a SUPERWOMAN. However, as in Karyn White’s song, sometimes we just don’t want to be that person. As much as we enjoy taking care of our loved ones, it’s equally as nice to know that someone is willing to take care of us. If we don’t step back from the day to day rigors of life we run the risk of being unable to take care of others, and ourselves as well. For as super as we are at some point we have to take off the cape and put out the sign that reads: Out to lunch.