Thursday, August 27, 2009

Bag Lady

We've all heard about the "good ole faithful," it describes any possession that's been our go to for ages. Whether it's the ratty pair of sweats, dilapidated slippers or frayed sweater; we hold on never dreaming of throwing it away.

Oftentimes we treat our mental and emotional scars in the same manner. Regardless of how good our present lives may be we drift back to days long gone, reflecting on our hurts and shortcomings. We allow them to play on our psyche, thus inadvertently causing grief. The result; lack of trust, self doubt, emotional detachment and the list goes on. Nothing good comes out of carrying around luggage from the past. In a nutshell it stifles your growth; physical, mental, emotional and spiritual. We cannot move on if we're constantly referencing what happened back when. Just because the relationship with Bill didn't work out doesn't mean the same will happen with Bob. Just because a friend betrayed us doesn't mean that we should never open ourselves up to friendship again. You get the point.

We've been bumped, bruised and knocked down at times...but we get up. It's not easy but it is essential to the development of our character. It boils down to this...Life chapter 7 will not begin favorably if we don't get pass chapter 5. We can't change the past but we can change our reaction to it. Stop letting old things crowd your closet...throw away the slippers, sweats and sweaters and decide to pack light!

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

What About Your Friends

Proverbs 18:25
A man that hath friends must shew himself friendly:and there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother.

My mother drilled into me at a young age, "be careful who you call friend, the ones closest to you can hurt you the most." Over time I've come to understand what that truly means. Not everyone you call friend will be a friend to you. In my life I've encountered many people that well deserve the title and others who did not. It wasn't until I was older that I became careful not to misuse the word "friend." The term friend means different things to different people. Some consider a friend to be the go to, down-for-whatever party goer. Others view a friend as a lunch buddy they hang out with at work. Then there are those people who see a friend as someone to bail them out of trouble or hook them up with perks. In fact a friend is much more than that.

As women, we tend to form a stronger emotional bond to the people around us. Therefore, our friendships often go deeper than just social gatherings and clothes swapping. The people I've called "friend,"commonly ended up being more like family. Those that I consider to be true friends, even now, are my family. These are women who challenge me to move forward in pursuing my dreams; setting fear aside. Women who have prayed with me at some of the lowest points in my life. Women who will put me in my place or tell me when I am dead wrong; not out of malice but because they know the type of person I am trying to be. Women who know when something is wrong without saying a word and have the wherewithal to offer a word of encouragement. All of these things and more are what friendship is about.

We sometimes find ourselves in a place of life re-evaluation. The things that used to work in high school or college don't any more. And unfortunately some of the friendships we've forged are casualties of change; for good and bad. Like an email I once read stated; "People come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime." I challenge you all to take a long look at yourself and those around you and ask; "which one am I?"

Friendship is a gift; enjoy it and cherish it while you have it!